Thank you to all the people who have annoyed me today...

Thank you weather lady for telling me it would piss it down when I had only just finished straightening my hair, you really made me feel great about leaving the house this morning, thank you...

Thank you train enemy for once again standing in front of me at the last minute and getting a seat before me, thank you for being so scrawny and white that I would feel bad flicking you out of my way, thank you...

Thank you silly woman who decided to walk down the wet stairs while the bus was still moving and screaming all the way as you flew to the bottom and landed in a heap, you made me late for work, thank you...

Thank you member of IHT (who will not be named) who continues to pester and claim importance and name-drop in efforts to better his seat at the IHT Annual Luncheon... you are a toad and of no importance to me, thank you...

... and thank you in advance to all those people who have yet to annoy me today, you will step in front of me, stop in front of me, shove me, cough on me and talk too loudly on your mobile.

N.B to self... get out of London!